Sunday, July 12, 2009

4 Religion in One

Day 01: September 24th 2004 Background Nila, a 47 year old lady came to see me for facial palsy with diabetes and hypertension. Her family background was unique- father was a Muslim and mother, a Buddhist, whereas, Nila herself was married in a Christian family. 


Since Nila’s childhood she had the special gift of receiving healing oil in her palms from Lord Shiva while meditating. She used to speak in a strange language during meditation. There was no restriction in practicing this in her family. Unusual Fear Nila was very scared even after being explained the benign nature of the disease as seen by her normal MRI. 


Keeping her spiritual background in mind, I tried to take her back to her previous birth. Quickly, she was in deep meditation and started visualizing: She said, “a small girl who wasn’t related to me, but she was very close to me because her father and mother used to go to work.” She used to always stay with me; even though I was married, I had no children. So I used to look after her. And her parents felt that I would be a good mother to the child. Nila said, “But I couldn’t save her, that movement she was not with me, but I was in the kitchen doing some work.” 

She said, “ I heard her voice, I don’t know whether it was a river, I had to go, there was water, that child fell into that and her father was there, but he didn’t take any notice, soon after I fainted, that’s all I know, when I got up I saw her body, she was dead.” “I think she is angry with me, because I didn’t save her, but it was not my fault.” I came as soon as I heard her voice and screamed to her father and fainted, but I felt she was angry. 

Further into the meditation, Nila said, “What is this country? It is far, starting with M, nice hair, they cover their hair with weed, and they dress like dancers.” She said, “We are short people. There is a young girl with beads in her hair. Lots of milk and cows are there.” She said, “Is it India? No, Nepal, it is not a city, a village, we are gorkhas. I was very beautiful but no children. I think that girl is angry with me.”

I asked her if she could see any one from this life. I don’t want any harm to my sister, mother and my father. I love him very much. I asked her, “Where is your father?” 

She said, “He is a distant doctor; he passed away 4-5 years ago.” I asked her if she could see him. She said, “He is in a good place, he is looking at me, and he loves me.” She also said, “He is very happy and I am happy that he is not here right now because he is the first person who is going to worry about me.” She said that Lord Shiva is always behind her and he is not going to leave her. He wants me to get over my fear. I asked Nila if she can find out the cause of her fear. 


She says, “I have not done any harm but I think that child is making me worry because I didn’t save that child’s life”, I am worried about others (What is other?). I wanted to have children but I didn’t. I asked her if she could find out where she is now. She says, “It is Nepal, a far off village, it was my previous birth about 7th century. It is like Kaftans, we had lots of cows. I was a vegetarian.” I asked her about her religion. 


She said, “I was a yogi, I was a Hindu, I used to practice yoga.” Then, she said, “Lord Shiva was always with me, and his son Murgeshan Kandswamy used to guide me. I was very religious. Because I didn’t have children, I used to spend more time towards my religion. It was a good life. But that child keeps me worried. I love to look after people. Will I be able to help people, Can’t I practice my religion? I worship Lord Shiva, Kandswamy, Pravatiamma, Vigneswara and Hanuman. I want to follow their path. Will they guide me? Yes.” Attempt to end life I used to cure people, but everything changed, I wanted to change my life. Before marriage, I was working in airlines, and I had a very nice life there. I used to fly to different countries, meet different people. Once I got married, my husband didn’t like me to work. And that made me a little angry, but then I listened to him, and I had my child so that kept me at home. But I love to work, I was never happy with the home life. But then I had to listen to my husband I had to look after my child. So, I decided to stay back, then I started worshiping Lord Shiva and Kandswamy. I had a problem, and I lost all my money. I was being cheated when my husband was abroad. He wanted to come back; I wanted to start some business, so that when he comes back, he can take over. But then I met this lady. I asked her who the lady was. She said that she was introduced by a friend to her and then she started working with her and that lady cheated her. 

Nila said, “I think she had charmed me; she was everything to me.” “I forgot my husband, my mother, even my child.” She took everything whatever I had and then that time I tried to commit suicide, I wanted to kill my child, but God helped me. My husband saw the incident and he screamed and said, “You have no right to kill my child.” I said, “I can’t leave my child with you I love him so much”. Nila then started crying. She said, “I wanted to take the child. But my husband didn’t let me.” But God saved me. “I was so stupid to want to kill my child.” Transformation I asked her, “When was that?” She said that it was 6 years ago. “I was so foolish to work with that lady.” “Everybody was telling me that I was a fool and after that I was careful of everything.” And, then I used to scream “O God, come and help me, I need you.” I think at that time Lord Kandswamy came to me and even though I am a Muslim, I used to go to temple. Because my mother was a Buddhist, and I was a person who never believed in any thing, never believed in horoscope, never believed in Gods, holy Koran, and holy Bible or anything else. It was just fun for me at that time. But when I got into trouble, I wanted God’s help and actually God came and he tried to take me to another path. I worked for 1.5 years. She said, “I sat near them (Gods) . I prayed to them. I used to worship greatly, meditate and while meditating used to cure many people by medicine: for headache, heart problems, stomach problems, rashes. I told there was a daughter in my house who had not been cured for 12 years. 

She went to several doctors. Once I sat there in meditation I healed her completely. It was a miracle that day and I started loving those Gods so much. I used to fast on Tuesday and Friday; I used to sit down and help the poor people so that they could be cured, because they didn’t have money to go to the hospital. She said that suddenly everything changed. “Saitan was pulling me away.” “My mind was not stable.” “I wanted to change completely but that didn’t work.” So, I decided to go back to the Gods. “I must sit there; I must worship them, I must cure whoever comes to me.” My family always supported me for healing, they are very nice. I was in very good health, I never had a headache, I was healthy. My children were healthy. 

She said, “I feel sleepy now, can I sleep?” Day 02: September 25th 2004 Dr Deb: Do you want to go back again? Can you find out what is worrying you? Nila: “I told you there was a child that keeps coming back.” Dr Deb: Can you find out where that child has gone? Nila: I have to go back. Shall I go back? She is nowhere close to me. She is born again. I see a crowded place, very crowded, there are some people wearing turbans. I see her still small. Dr Deb: How old is she? 

Nila: She is just 6-7 years old. 

Dr Deb: What is her name? Nila: Starting with R…. Rakiya- Rakiya Mandir. That’s what I am seeing. She is very happy. It shows the state of Gujarat, middle part of India. Her parents are rich, I am happy because she is happy. I think my father is a businessman and is going around the world. He is an educated man. She has two more sisters and she is the youngest. I can see her face: she is pretty; she has short curly hair, fair skin, very fair, not dark like me, and big eyes. Her mother wore a sari in Gujarati style. Maybe they are Punjabis working in Gujarat. He is going to Johannesburg, Africa. That is the place you get lots of shiny things. 

Dr Deb: Can you find out the address? 

Nila: I can see some figures, but not clearly. I can see him flying, gets down at Johannesburg. I can see that figure; it is a 218 no. board in the house. It is a very busy place. I find it very difficult to find the address. There is some kind of blockage. Father’s name is P. Singh, he is Panjabi. There are different kinds of people. The address is being blocked. Haj from Heaven 

Dr Deb: Can you find out where your father is? 

Nila: He is in a good place; I don’t want to bring him down. He is looking at me. Allah O Akbar. Allah O Akbar. My father. Allah O Akbar. He is in a good place. He visits Mecca. Allah O Akbar…. Salam …. Allah O Tala. Nila asks me if she can cover her head. She says, “He is very happy, he always wanted to go there, and he is there in Mecca.” “He goes around the Kaba. He is very happy he always wanted to go there.” “He worships so much, Salim Mussaam, may he rest in peace, may his soul rest in peace.”

She says, “He is great.” Every day at least one time he goes around the Kaba in Saudi in the morning around 10 am. He is happy to see me. He is white, he is great. He was paralyzed at that time. I was in London- my first time in Airline. He took me to the airport, while returning he was not there in Airport to receive me. It affected me very much. One of my uncles came; I kept on asking where my father is? He should be here, not you. He took me home and then to the hospital where my father was totally paralyzed. He just looked at me. He wanted to talk but he couldn’t, was crying. He couldn’t talk to me and that was the worst incident that I saw in my life when my father was in bed. After Ayurvedic treatment he recovered, not totally, but he was strong. 


Xenoglossia Nila says, “Thank God, he is now in a good place.” If he had seen me like this he would have been the most unhappy person. I was mad. I was very strong, yes, Lord Shiva will help me to become strong. Om Shiv Shakti. Om Shiv Shakti… Omm Shiv Shakti.. Omm Shiv Shiv Shakti, Omm Parmeswara Omm Lingeshwara, Omm Shakti. She then started chanting the mantra in some strange language, probably Nepali. In her meditative stage, she goes into the same state and speaks in a similar way. She receives healing oil in her hand which she uses to cure patients.


Monday, July 6, 2009

Divinity and Magical Maya

Background
Ridam: 43-year-old working in a private company. Married to Rina for over 14 years.

Rina: A bright woman married to Ridam.

Anya: Ridam's sister-in-law.

Deep: Common friend of Ridam and me

Ridam had helped his sister-in-law, Anya, in finding a job and settling down. Anya reciprocated his support with lots of love, affection, and gratitude. In due course of time with Anya’s career shaping up and with the proximity to Ridam, she was infatuated to the extent, that her only goal in life was to marry Ridam. She attempted in several ways to convince him including, taking her own life to pursue her goal. With all this going on, Ridam and Rina's marital relationship was strained along with his other social and professional responsibilities. My friend, Deep who was close to Ridam & Anya referred this challenging case to me in 2005 for counseling despite the fact that it was beyond the scope of my domain.

Ridam’s wife, Rina was patient and understanding all along and ready for any solution to attain happiness. Ridam and Anya came back to me in December 2007 and informed me about their decision to get married. I was supportive of their decision thinking that was the only solution. Deep was disillusioned with my decision and as a conservative person, he wanted to normalize the relationship according to Indian social norms.
2008
On Deep's insistence, Ridam came with Anya after 6 months on June 7th, 2008 for further counseling. There was nothing to advise them as they were already living together and wanted to seek my moral support. However, Ridam disclosed to me a warning by an astrologer, that as long as he stays with his wife, he would be successful in his life. He was also told that at the age of 53, he would leave the material world and its associated pleasures to follow a totally devoted spiritual path. For me, it was very hard to comprehend because he was materialistic, selfish and without any understanding of spiritual principles. He loved eating, smoking and drinking socially, enjoying his life, was a ruthless administrator at work and known popularly as a fearless go-getter who would pursue his personal desires strongly.
Unanticipated transformation


On June 21, 2008, Ridam, Rina and Anya came back together with some expectation to solve their problem. I was not sure how to tackle the situation other than seeking spiritual help. It was probably the first ever meditation for Ridam; soon, after closing his eyes there was a thud, he was rolling on the ground, breaking his expensive eyeglasses. He was making weird expressions, whistling and making meowing sounds with strange animal-like behavior. Both his wife and sister-in-law were smiling and accolading his acting skills. He was left alone and the sisters were taken out to explain the possibility of an evil entity affecting him probably the cause of their turmoil. After an hour he came out from the trance and explained: There were many black figures, deformed bodies, rape, sexual patterns, murder, and other negative scenes. There was only a streak of light and he was exhausted. I had a ray of hope, which was communicated to the family.

On subsequent meditation sessions, there was a gradual transformation from black energy to more celestial light which was encouraging. Glimpses of Sarodama, Ramakrishna, Sai Baba, Jesus, Buddha and Ma Kali with intermittent distractions from black figures.

Anya was depressed with Ridam's transformation and losing hope of getting him back. She attempted suicide on June 26th with large doses of sedatives, however, recovered after stomach washes from the emergency department.

The meditation sessions continued with the witnessing of God, Goddesses and Celestial light. In one of the sessions, Devi Kali instructed Ridam to perform Sandhya Pooja for Anya by standing on one leg wearing a red bordered sari, covering her head. She also explained the dedicating mudra (hand posture). She also gave a mantra to perform the pooja near the banks of Ganges in front of Tulsi tree. The appearance of Mahatma Gandhi, in an old dhoti, instructing him to follow the path of truth at all cost was also remarkable.
Witnessing Past Lives like an old film
Executioner in Punjab
On July 6th, Ridam insisted on getting him regressed to see his past lives. Soon after the initial guidance, he started visualizing himself as a black strong man with mustache handling prisoners. He was speaking in Hindi and there were many English policemen around him. He recognized the place as Punjab, in North India. During his childhood, he was bribed by an English soldier to tell the whereabouts of Indian freedom fighters. Later, he was employed as an executioner in prison. It was around the mid-nineteenth century; he could see a black well repeatedly near his prison. Not long before, he got fed up with his job and while trying to shoot at an English soldier, he was killed. He did not recognize anyone from his present life in that life.
Farmer in Bengal
It was a lush green field and he was going for farming, probably in Bengal or some fertile location in the eastern part of India. He recognized Anya as his daughter in that life who was around 3-4 years old. She was strongly attached to him and used to go with him to the field sitting on his back. He would tie her to a tree while working in the field. She was quite finicky, always crying and never leaving him alone. This was quite similar to Anya’s behavior in this life too. One day while he was cutting rice yield from his paddy field while sitting on the ground, Anya called out for help. When he got up to see, a Cobra bit him right on his face and instantly he dropped dead. Anya started crying and became hysteric on losing her father. Interestingly, Ridam saw his mother- in- law as his wife in that life; It wasn't a very happy relationship, which is true in this life also.
King of Arabia
Ridam's next life was that of a King in some Arab country. He started seeing deserts, sand dunes, camels and mountains. He was in a white robe with some sort of a headscarf. He was strong, tall, and with a large kingdom to manage. He started speaking in Arabic which I could not comprehend. It was a good life, according to him. A palace, crystals, glasses, beautiful women around, no wife, anyone he wished, he would live with. He had a son, who is also his son, in the present life, there was as a strong bond between them. His son was very clever and practical; once there was an invasion by another king which his son had warned him before. During the war with that powerful king, he got killed but son escaped realizing his father's mistake.
Son of a Landlord
In another life, Ridam saw his present wife as his strict mother and teacher in an English medium school. His father was a landlord, in Gujarat. He died in a car accident along with his father when he was a child.

The next day more details of the same life were explored. Anya was his aunt and his mother's co-sister. Ridam recollected that Anya troubled his wife (then the widowed mother) making her work and doping her with opium. And, one day the mother fled away from home to a saint who was her father in this life. He helped her and cursed her co-sister for harassing her. Subsequently, there was a cholera epidemic and everyone except Anya died. Slowly she transformed after coming in contact with a doctor (Ridam's father in this life) and learned herbal medicine. She cured many patients and one day while meditating saw her co-sister. Finally, she also arrived in the same ashram and gradually relationship with co-sister improved.

Despite the knowledge of their past life relationships, there was no change in the dispute at home.
Another dimension to the problem
Haunting
A new dimension to the case opened up when the cause of Ridam’s strange behavior during the trance such as making peculiar faces, whistling and meowing like a cat was being understood.

Ridam saw a black evil cat whistling, a black tunnel, and an old lady making evil faces. He said, "It was my mother’s figure through which this wicked lady was speaking." Slowly the image of his maternal aunt emerged. She was very close to Ridam and his mother, but, she was also jealous of her sister's happy married life. All the problems of his mother were connected with her aunt’s restless soul. His aunt died due to cancer when Ridam was young. She had several cats, and her death ceremony was not performed properly. The aunt's husband was alcoholic and their married life was discontented, causing frustration of her soul.

The aunt’s soul did not move out of this dimension and came to Ridam through an ancestral almirah, which was at Anya’s home. Anya's distress was connected with his aunt’s unsatisfied soul. Anya would be restless till this soul stayed there and it needed Shanti Pooja (a ritual to bring peace to the soul) and to relieve it from this world.

Ridam continues to experience divine presence during his mediation and the transformation was visible.

Ridam and I went to a Kali temple to consult a priest to bring peace to the evil spirit. He suggested two priests and the procedure to do the Pooja but he was a little scared too. When we went to see him later, he wasn't there. While meditating in front of Devi we felt a divine message and rushed to Anya’s home to perform the Pooja ourselves. While doing the pooja, Ridam’s aunt's spirit got irritated and started speaking through Ridam. She elucidated why she has chosen to haunt his house after his marriage. Her married life was not happy; therefore she did not want anyone else to be happily married. She wanted to separate Ridam from Rina. She said, "Everyone enjoyed during Ridam's wedding and nobody remembered her." Ridam's aunt's soul was pleading to not disturb her and let her stay with them. She also explained how to do the Shanti Pooja for her soul to move out.

I consulted a friend of mine whose son was possessed for years before he could get rid of the problem after seeking help from a Muslim priest practicing exorcism telepathically. The priest was quite confident of solving the problem and he said that there was quite a powerful spirit which was haunting her home. As the priest was conducting the ritual from a distance, Ridam’s aunt's soul was getting irritated and creating more problems. One day Ridam was in a trance while coming back from office. He was in an auto and started making similar wicked facial expressions and strange sounds. The auto driver got scared and asked him to leave without asking for money. Ridam was worried about his behavior and took advice from an astrologer again who advised to perform pooja at Kala Hasthi temple for Kal Sharpa dosh of Anya.
More Revelation


Mr. Singh came to see my house and do meditation on September 12th. Ridam and Anya went to Kala Hasthi temple on the same day pooja was good and they were happy with the outcome. As they were tired with the journey, he called me to inform that he may not come, nevertheless he came, as he was destined to. Despite his tiredness and lack of willingness to meditate, he started yawning and went into trance spontaneously as usual.

He saw Ma Kali in a furious mood SHE started scolding him. SHE told you went to a temple for Rahu Ketu pooja, bypassing me. I have created them they are under my feet. If you don’t follow what I instruct I would kill you and hang like others. I have only sent the Ghost in your house to scare you, if you behave like, ignoring me, then I shall send few more. I did not tell you one thing you were dacoit in one of the past life and you were my devotee. You were a Kapalic, used to kill people and offer me as balidan, of course, you killed those whom I wanted to & who were evil. Once you did penance for 108 days fasting nonstop, you had pledged to offer 108 hibiscus flower whereas you gave me two less. You are being punished owing to breach of a vow. Then she politely advised moreover you are my son so I can’t harm you further and instructed him to pray as SHE had already advised.
All Divine Drama


On October 1st, the new moon day and Mahalaya the day 0 of nine-day Devi pooja or Navaratri, Ridam was advised to perform an overnight pooja and with two hibiscus flowers on the day of Diwali, a month later. The next day he was advised to feed a snake with some milk. Ridam did not mind staying up overnight; however, he was scared of feeding a snake as he died of snakebite in one of his previous lives.

On October 6th, the sixth day of Navaratri, Devi communicated with Ridam while he was meditating, revealing that there would be rain on Navami, the 9th day of Navaratri; he was asked to collect rainwater and conduct a pooja with 9 bananas placed as Navagrahas. Anya was asked to make all the arrangements for the pooja to overcome the ignorance and doshas of her past lives.

It wasn't rainy season and usually, there are no rains this time around at this location. Until the evening of Navami, there was no rain till Ridam called me to inform that there was a downpour near his house which is east of my house. There was no sign of rain in our area; however, soon it started raining and continued for 2 days like some sort of divine intervention!

Ridam came with his wife on 20th October and we meditated on the top floor pooja room. Devi told him that she liked him and that Anya was his Dasi (maidservant) in that life and she didn't want him to perform all the Poojas and devote his life to Devi. Further, Devi told him that Anya wanted him to marry her and she was the one who removed the two flowers from his 108 days of fast and Pooja to break his trust from his devotion and get attracted to the more materialistic world.

Anya was his assistant who looked after the farm and household chores. She wanted him to spend time with her, not with Devi. She drugged him with opium out of anger, jealousy, and frustration on failing to achieve her goals. He died on the 7th day after the fast. She again instructed Anya to prepare blog (offering) and give two hibiscus flowers on the day of Diwali, which was indebted in her past lives to Devi, feed milk to a snake because she was like a cobra in the last life and to clear her sins.

SHE also told to pray for Brahma (Creator God) and Vishnu (Sustainer God) and offer bhog every day whatever you eat. She told Rina was his mother in last life and Lakshmi (Goddess of Wealth and Prosperity) in this one.

On 29th October Diwali night he did pooja but did not feed a cobra as advised, and next day came to feed the holy cow the sacred Prasad. She again predicted the next rain on 36th and 45th day and also advised to collect water and to perform pooja to Devi.

Ridam went on a tour once again and when he came back on the November 1st, Devi burnt his palms & fingers for untruthful to her about his devotion.

Ridam and Anya were not very regular in performing Devi Pooja. There was no rain on full moon day. On 21st November afternoon, there was unexpected rain which was the 45th predicted day. It was Kartik (Lunar month of Diwali festival) Navami, I collected rainwater for him and called Anya; she knew this was the day Ridam was supposed to do the Pooja.

On 23rd November Devi again warned Ridam for not following HER instructions and SHE would kill all of them. SHE gave him one last chance to perform the Pooja on 27th November- the new moon day. SHE asked Ridam to wake up at 5 am and wear a new dhoti and red towel on the head without any clothing on the chest and to make bhog and distribute it to everyone around.

On 27th November Ridam conducted the pooja in the morning as told and danced with Devi. She said to Ridam that if he cannot find a snake, he should go to Dr. Deb’s house and there is a snake around his house. He came with milk and there was a snake seen in our garden during those days.

On 27th December Rina came with her mother at the clinic to consult my wife. She was unhappy about the progress and revealed that Ridam was asking for a divorce. I came home and prayed for their well being.

On 28th December I called Ridam to sit for a Saturday meditation and told him not to take any decisions for separation without consulting Devi. Ridam and Anya were living together. Devi told whatever he wishes he can do, after 8years, 8month, and 8days, he would come to her, leaving everything. He would go to a Jungle and then peacefully leave the body. Devi will inform when and how he will die and where he would take the next birth. His present problems are due to his past karma and will continue for some time.
2009
10th January 2009 I called Ridam for Saturday meditation since it was a full moon day. He was out in a company picnic. Devi told Ridam that he has no light in his life and there was "Kaal Shaap" meaning "Curse of Time", which he is going through, the deeper meaning of Kaal Sharpa dosha. They have to pass through this difficult time and it would last for a few months. Ridam's astrology chart also confirmed there was Shani Sade Sati till next year. Anya's natal chart too showed some problem in her moon with darkness in her life which will be difficult to get over with.

On 8th March, Anya brought Ridam for meditation since they weren't regular in performing the Pooja at home. We meditated on the top floor, Devi asked him as to why did he hide the truth since it was Devi who had asked them to see me as they were not sincere in their beliefs. SHE instructed to come another day (SHE would tell the date) to my house and sit on the ground floor where SHE had first seen him. We need to keep her statue in the South direction and sit with a red cloth on the head without any clothing on the chest. She told how one day she would transfer all his power to Anya, who will get transformed call him up. She did not advise to do the Kala Hasthi since SHE is the creator. Everything will take its time; she said if you can’t manage 5 people at home, can you imagine how difficult it is for ME to manage the whole world.

On 22nd March, Sunday Ridam came to my place to meditate as per Devi's suggestion. She said that all his problems of present life were due to past Karma. He was HER devotee as a Kapalic 300 years back, because of that, he could see HER now again. Devi went on to say that "I was also HER devotee 500 years ago in some village where there was a draught and I built a temple of Ma Kali and helped people selflessly." One day SHE will guide us to go to that place. SHE wanted both of us to meet hence SHE created this drama. Ridam will come out of the present problem soon without any loss to his family. He has a more serious future mission. Anya has to go through her karma, what she did in the past life, stealing two hibiscuses and poisoning Ridam. Everything started in this house and will follow too.
Final Cleansing of Soul


Ridam called me on 5th April and gave me the shocking news of Anya's sudden death following an accident. He was with his wife following his eye operation. Later, they came to know how she fell off the 5th floor and died on 4th April. Following the postmortem, the body was released and cremated. Everything went on smoothly, for such an unnatural death. Hindu rituals are different for such deaths- on the 4th day, there is a Pooja which was performed at a Kali temple in her birthplace. The last ritual was to submerge the ashes of her body in some holy river on the 10th day. This was done in a sacred river near a Saraswati temple.

Ridam had a recurring vision of Anya lying down and her soul being freed even before her death. He also saw Anya’s final destination and beyond in his meditation. Her soul was resting in a transition period in Shiv Lok with Mother Kali and is extremely happy. She has no pains or regrets anymore, her soul understands the journey of life and the reasons very well; possibly, soon she would take another birth in south India in a wealthy family and her father would be her husband in the next life.

On 18th April Ridam came in the morning to meditate at my house. Devi asked him to look up when he started to protrude his tongue (showing HER presence). He said, "yes, you are wearing a beautiful nose ring." SHE had asked to look further up between HER two eyes- the third eye was rotating like earth and he could see Anya as a child with Lord Shiva and Devi. She was given the job of picking flowers in their garden. Devi has cleaned all her past sins and after a year will send her down to south India with a new life. She would take birth in a prosperous family but will not recognize Ridam or have any relationship with anybody from her past lives except her present father. SHE did not want her to be trapped in Maya. Ridam will only know her whereabouts and age when he would be on his death bed.
SHE again predicted another rain on the 51st day (7th June Full moon day) and asked to drink and take a bath in the holy rainwater. Symbolically it will clean her soul further and improve the depressed conditions of the needy and poor

On 2nd May Ridam saw in deep meditation that Anya was there with him for 16 previous lives. She had to finish her old karma and start from the beginning.

Initially there was a prediction of early Monsoon this year; however, there were no rain till the first week of June and the weather reports predicted a late monsoon, but suddenly on the June 7th afternoon, thick black clouds came from the East and it rained for a ½ hour. We all enjoyed the first divine shower and drank the water. I got an SMS from Ridam saying, “Maybe this was the final act which we needed to do for her soul to be in complete happiness and move to the next level. It was very nice that you could also participate. 5.01 pm”.

A Cruel King

July 27, 2009:

Ridam called me on July 27th after a month and a half to tell me that he was quite busy with his work and wasn’t able to meditate. The last he meditated was on July 26th-Nag Panchami day (devotees offer prayers to snakes in the name of God). Ridam said, “Devi was in an aggressive mood and asked me to go to your house to meditate saying she would give some message.”

August 2, 2009:

On August 2nd, Ridam came with Rina and his son who wanted to see his past life and confirm our findings. We sat for meditation after initial yawning and head drooping, Ridam fell on one side; his son and wife were not in a trance and were watching him. He sat down after lying for almost half an hour. I was in a deep trance and was visualizing Ma Kali. Due to the tingling in my leg, I shifted back and sat in an easy pose. Within a few minutes, Ridam fell on my lap and his tongue was protruding and dry and he was asking for water. “Can you realize how you feel when you are thirsty; you have killed so many people without water in a desert. A man whose feet you are lying told you not to do this, he was a Pundit, you did not listen. You wanted power and only power, you were like a Chandal, and there is no difference between a King and Chandal. You have to suffer for what you did in that life. The only way to rid of your sin is if this man (Dr. Deb) forgives you for what you have done. If he refuses you have to suffer and start from the beginning.” Devi said in anger. His throat and mouth were dry and he was panting for water, we brought water but realized that Devi wanted him to know what happens when you need water in a desert. SHE continued “That girl (Anya) will start a new life after seven and a half months. Everything good will happen to her but for you everything bad. If you don’t listen and follow what I say and do pooja with this man (Dr. Deb), nothing will improve. You have to get a kick from this man then only you will improve. You know why I am helping you because you have done penance in one life” said Devi in resentment. Ridam did not remember anything after the session; Rina was skeptical about what he had told in the session. Ridam was relaxed and astonished to hear what Devi had told him. We discussed spirituality for some time. Rina wanted to learn more about “Past Life.”

When I narrated the incident to my uncle, a retired Professor of English, he asked whether Ridam takes drugs, he was astonished beyond belief.


August 13th, 2009 (Phone call):

On August 13th, Ridam called to tell me how his life was being controlled by Devi. Recently, he completed furnishing his flat and wanted to rent it out. Devi had asked him not to worry and conduct a puja by placing Lord Nataraja, Lord Krishna, and Devi Kali’s pictures as no one would come before September. Ridam did not believe that and continued making futile efforts to find a tenant for the last three months. However, yesterday to his astonishment a tenant came to occupy the flat from 1st of September because his daughter was enrolled in an Engineering college nearby. To test Devi, Ridam insisted them to come before September, but they communicated their inability to do so.



August 26th, 2009 (Phone call):



On August 26th, Ridam developed pain in his joints and found that his uric acid was raised. So, he meditated and saw that Devi Kali was very angry. Ridam could see a Trisula coming from my house and Her face and my face were merging. She was telling him that if he failed to listen to HER, SHE will take away everything from him. It was a warning and a suggestion. Now, Ridam understood how my Sadhana was protecting him. If he does not listen to me like the previous lives, the consequences would be grave.



August 28th, 2009:



After Devi’s warning, Ridam started meditating for the last 3 days. He saw that there was a temple of Ma Kali and Krishna at my place; I was a priest of the temple. One day there was an earthquake or an eruption and I had died inside the rubble with Ma Kali. He says it was 200 years ago. There was a pond on the side of the temple and I used to take a bath there daily. Because of that old temple, the place is so powerful and blessed.



September 2nd, 2009:

On September 2nd we went to pick up an Esteem car from Banjara Hills near Apollo. The car stopped working the night before when Shantanu was coming back from office in heavy rain. It was towed down to GEM motors; when I went in the evening to pick up the car, there was news of lost helicopter of our CM.

At 4.45 pm I asked Mr. Shyam Singh to Dowse and he replied that the dowser was not moving, not a very auspicious omen.

Next day morning, I saw light coming from Ma Kali and the CMs soul was not seen around the earth. I asked Ridam to meditate in the evening to see what exactly had happened. Ridam saw Lord Shiva, throwing Trisula at the helicopter with light coming out from the Trishul. Probably, the CM had promised to build a Shiva temple and look after a village but failed to do so.

Next, Ridam saw in the third eye of Devi Ann telling how she will be born in a seaside village after 5 months and 19 days, she asked to do puja at my home one day before she takes rebirth.

When Ridam asked Devi if he can go to Shyam Singh, Devi told him to follow HER only.



On 4rth September, as predicted by Devi, a person came to occupy Ridam’s new flat. He had come before but refused to come in August and came back in September. Now, Ridam is more and more convinced about Devi’s words always coming true and is scared of his father’s death after 3 years, his mother going mad after that and his leaving the world after 8-10 years.

On 5th September, we went with Ridam’s family to Gandi Maisamma temple near my house.




Impending disaster

October 2nd, 2009, Ridam received a warning message from Ma Kali in meditation regarding impending disaster with loss of lives within the next 27 days.
Deepawali puja message
Ridam called me to tell Devi's message on meditation today: He saw what was in the future for Ann as well as her past and present; she would take birth after 4 months and 23 days. Devi also asked to meditate on the day of Diwali from 7.30 to 9.30 pm or after 10.30 pm along with offering Bhog Prasad.

Deepawali & Kali Puja 17th October 2009


Devi Ma has told before, in meditation to make, Khichari, Potato fry, and Brinjal fry. Offer Kumkum with Ridam’s blood and cut pumpkin as a symbolic sacrifice. Devi also told to wear dhoti and a red cloth over waist, not to cover the chest.



Ridam came with Prasad, flower and other Puja material. We started Puja at 7.30pm as Devi given auspicious time for Puja from 7.30-9.30pm and then after 10.30pm. I was also fasting without water since last night.



Ridam cut pumpkin as a sacrifice after applying Kumkum. He applied Kumkum and blood from his finger which I had pricked on HER forehead. He went into meditation and protruded tongue, to show HER presence, chanted mantra which Devi has given him before. Devi communicated HER unhappiness about what is going on in the world, on HER name how priests are taking money, some are chanting some Mantra and take Rs 1000 in their pocket and others scare on MY name and charge Rs 2000. If any time Ridam takes money on HER name, SHE would take away all the powers which SHE has given HIM in a fraction of second. SHE was feeling hot her hair was open as Ridam was showing through his hand. SHE went to take a bath in the pond on the side of the house, which is not clean. Ridam saw HER going inside clean but when she came out the water turn into dark due to pollution of the earth. SHE said water is dirty and stinking, this is the dirt of the earth. SHE said this house is clean because there was HER temple long back with Lord Krishna, there was lots of Puja in this place, everything went down in earth quack.



Today people are bursting cracker, but I will burst in next 15 days three times then they realize.



Ridam wanted to open his eye twice during Puja, SHE said don’t try to open your eyes your mind is in MY control, even if you try you cannot. Then SHE asked to tie her hair, which Ridam did. SHE asked for food and told Ridam to take the Prasad Devi asked for more food and then wanted to rest. SHE went into sleep at the end of the puja.



Rina Visualized Gods (October 17th, 2009)

Rina stayed back home on Diwali to meditate. First time soon after closing her eyes she could see Lord Vishnu clearly and followed by other Indian Gods, Laxmi, Shiva, Ganesh, and Saints: Ramkrishan, Vivekanand, Sharoda ma, Rabindranath, and Gandhi.

Later she saw Kali ma’s huge live statue at my home with a smiling face. Ridam and I were praying HER. She was in deep meditation for one hour from 7.40 to 8.40pm.

Her happiness was obvious on her phone call. She was always critical of Ridam’s experience and was challenging him what Devi would communicate to him.

November 21st, 2009 Ann's Rebirth and Shiv puja

Ridam was reminded of Ann's rebirth 3 months and 14 days later

December 16th, 2009 Tuesday New Moon

Early morning Ridam felt like meditating not knowing the significance of the day. He saw Devi Kali, Jesus, Balaji Venkatesh. Devi predicted a few important dates
Ridam's death: 54years 5month 11 days
Rina's death: 59 years 25days
Ann's rebirth: 2 month 28days

Feb 12th, 2010 Shiv Ratri

Ann's rebirth in 27 days

March 4th, 2010

Sit for Kali puja on 6th March at home with S.ip..na in traditional dress, dhoti applies kumkum on the chest and head, S.ip..na should wear a red bordered sari. Arindam has to cook prasad, khichari, brinjal and potato fry, sweets and start puja at 6.30pm, sacrifice a pumpkin

March 6th Saturday 2010

At 6.30 sat for puja Sriporna could see a glimpse of Ma Kali and saw her grandfather in a garden in the UK
Arindam saw another life with his SripS.ip..naorna in some place starting from K, there was a kali mandir in a cave on the top of the hill and both of them used to do puja. Once a king of that place wanted to take charge of the place which Ridam resisted, resulted in losing a life by King beheading, S.ip..na escaped.

Ann will take birth in 9days 10 night on a seaside in a state with a name starting from K. She will live in a village with a traditional setup. The day will fall on 16th March a new year day for Karnataka and Andhra.

March 16th Udagi

On Saturday Sunday meditation got a message about the birth of Ann on Ugadi at 1.20pm 140km southwest in Karnataka.

July 11th, 2010

I went to see Dr. Manoj's new clinic and then visited Ridam for dinner. It was Saturday and he was regular in weekly meditation. Messages were almost repetitive. Yesterday he saw Brhamand and Devi were showing how we are entangled in the materialistic world of Maya. He saw the scale of the Universe which is created and destroyed by Lord Brahma.

July 24th, 2010

Ridam got a message during meditation that he has to do Kali or Shiv puja on next Lunar eclipse (21st Dec 2010) with two red flowers to clear Shani effect from Ann's next life. She was born on the 26th of Nov which is Shani's No 8. By this puja solar effect which will counter Shani on the day of the eclipse.
All planetary positions are decided by Gods. I can go with Ridam for puja nobody else since they do not believe.



[8:17PM, 04/04/2015] 
Ridam: Today is lunar eclipse .6th death anniversary of Anna. ...Saturday which is the day of maa kali ...coincidence?
[10:41AM, 05/04/2015] Ridam: Yesterday was also Hanuman Jayanthi
Ridam called for inguinal node FNAC showed malignancy. 15th Apr 2015
Meditated on new moon night SHE told your ego I have removed now talking out Kam. Node is just small boil don't worry. I have some jobs to be done before that all vices will be removed. Kam,  krodh moh lobh. 18th Apr 2015
Getting operated today 20th Apr. Pyocele and matted nodes.
Discharged today Dr. Rajgopal told abdomen is filled with nodes. Lymphoma or Secondary. 22nd Apr.
27th April today is Arindam's birthday. Biopsy report came as uncommon Testicular lymphoma. Spread to the inguinal node. Dr. Srinivas Chakravarti was consulted who gave appointment for Wednesday the 29th. It is curable he said.
On 7th May called him in the evening. He was meditating and called back. Ma Kali said I have already cut your abscess. It doesn't matter which doctor you see you will be alright for 5years. After that, you can only see me.
The biopsy came as Testicular lymphoma and chemotherapy started. 3rd cycle over with minimal side effects. Next chemo on 22 July. Will not go with us to Yatra. 6th July 2015.
Now all chemotherapy is over Maa Kali said after five-year real thing will start. 

Sri...na broke her leg right tibia and fibula while walking in Singapore on 12th Dec 16. She was casted and send back to India. Dr. Sarat did an operation and nailed tibia at Apollo JH on 15th Dec. Ridam got a warning from Ma Kali that he should do puja on Tuesday and Wednesday wherever he goes else She would take away his Son. SHE had already warned Ridam regarding future problems in the family.

Diwali puja 2017 Oct 19

Ridam had good meditation in Diwali started at 11 pm for one hour. Ma asked for blood. Jojo had to prick to draw blood. It was deep. He has left a job and doing some work from home.


Saturday, July 4, 2009

Angelic Counseling for Addiction



Mara, a 29-year-old young lady who was full of life and happiness never anticipated that her life would change so drastically due to certain incidents in her life. Happily married and settled with the love of her life and loving parents and in-laws she was lively and joyous with things moving better than expected professionally and personally for her. She was always the best in her education, profession and otherwise too…she smiled the world would smile.


Three years after her marriage, Mara who was an occasional social drinker and enjoyed cooking and dancing on the weekend get-togethers with her friends and family suddenly lost track of herself. She lost herself to alcohol…her habit took over her and her strong mind and she became the slave to the dark world of evil and addiction. She would listen to nobody and would lie, steal just to get to the dungeon of darkness where there was evil and there were bad things.


This problem affected not only her personal life with her husband who did all he could to love her and comfort her but also her parents and in-laws who underwent severe trauma for that and half year of her severe addiction to alcohol. She could not perform at work and went absconding a number of times to drink…slowly things worsened as she started stealing money from her family, her husband and from her home…to the extent she sold all her jewelry just to have money to blow on alcohol. There was no count or track of her expenditure. In the meantime, she also took loans from the bank and pretended as though her job was still intact and used up the loan money as her salary…life worsened not only for Mara but for her entire family as she started disappearing from home and roaming drunk. Life had become hell for all her family members ...Psychiatric consultations, medication and lots of all possible help were no better in bringing Mara back to her senses and in making her realize that she was being dominated by the evil force and in turn was ruining her life.


My close friend asked me whether I could solve the problem. They came to my house reluctantly; after an initial interview I was sure that she was not a usual case of addiction. She would drink a bottle without control and off alcohol for days without craving. Her mind was very clear, and she was very confident of winning the problem.


She was brought up in a modern educated family without any spiritual experience. My final weapon in such situation is divine help. Testing to know hypnotisability I did bucket balloon test. To my astonishment her hand started moving up, I did not lose opportunity to guide her to move up. Soon she was floating in a soft cloud and found her husband standing with buckeye to welcome her. He was asking her to come back; slowly she could visualize all her family members. There was a beautiful stream, and an angel was waiting for her, reaching near her. She said, 'you are in wrong path you should move to right'. She was very scared of a black figure and promised to not to go toward that. It was more than an hour of guided meditation and she was feeling much better. It was then all over for that time.


My friend and her husband were a bit skeptical, however I was quite hopeful. Fortunately, she realized the importance of her soul which is in communion with the Almighty, the Creator of all. It seemed to be more fruitful in her moments of existence as she gradually realized herself in a fuller manner. Her mind started to relax, she would visit me every week and talk and convey her feelings and fears…slowly the darkness in Mara’s life faded away and she truly experienced the light of life, the divine light of truth and goodness. It’s been two years since she gained a new flow of life and she has settled down in life and her self-realization has not only made her a better human being but also a good wife, daughter and a good professional. All she needed was an insight which she could not gain from anybody. Few things are hard to explain because they are beyond medicine…She is now a member of Paramhansa Yogoda Satsang Society and an ardent reader of spiritual and psychology books. Her addiction has vanished like a feather in the air and today she claims to be the happiest person on this earth. She says…her only motive is to remain happy and spread her kindness and smile all over the world. Mara is a true example to all people who have addiction problems that “nothing is impossible until you really want to make it happen".


Thursday, July 2, 2009

Divine Exorcism

Divine Exorcism

Wani, a 24-year-old Karate black belt trainer, experienced sudden changes in personality and violent behavior once a month. She felt someone was touching her hair and body, moving plates while eating.


Her symptoms persisted even after relocating to another country, prompting her to quit her job.

She consulted several priests, spending approximately 5–6 hundred thousand rupees without relief. Through information, she came to me, seeking confirmation of any physical nature to her problem. Reiki is a simple method to distinguish such cases; typically, physical problems relax after energy therapy, while dissociative and paranormal cases become more violent.


On her first visit, Wani entered a fit of rage, and her head began to rotate with loose hair. Initially, I was concerned and had two strong male assistants present to protect my computers from the black belt champion. Later, she revealed she had never hit anyone.


Despite my reluctance to treat such cases, Wani returned to me a month later, insisting I treat her. She believed her pain had worsened with holy water and prayer, or perhaps due to incomplete cleaning after visiting the church.

Day 01:

After guiding Hypno-Reiki, Wani saw a streak of light but could not move towards it, as a black figure was following and calling from below. Her head began to rotate with loose hair. There was a streak of light on the right side in the sky, and she could not move towards it. I asked her to call the light towards her, and it came to her like a laser beam piercing her heart. She felt a severe pain in her chest, like a heart attack, but she could see her heart gradually becoming white. The session continued for 7 hours, the longest ever done self-guided Reiki. She was exhausted by the end and wanted to go home. She also felt a headache and could not sleep properly that night.

Day 02:

The following day, Wani arrived around 12:20 pm. With guided Hypno-Reiki from 12:30 pm, I began trying to clean her. She could see the light, but the same black figure was disturbing her again. After a 2-hour effort, she could see the star. Cleaning started from the head with severe pain, which took several hours before becoming white. Her right hand was the last part that took the remaining 4 hours before getting white. There was a small patch over the left part of her back.


I was not sure about the source of light; when she was guided to trace the other end, it was a star attached to a rod. Jesus was holding the rod and emerged from the background, she explained:

"He is Jesus Christ, he said something, but I cannot understand. The black figure is down, and white color is calling up, white color is taking me upholding my hand. Left side is a dark color trying to touch me, but I am going up. He is cleaning my face, he has power. One hand holds the star. He is Jesus Christ. Light heart pain. The black figure is far apart, I am in a white light going up. He has a star in his hand. Now no heart pain, stomach pain is too much and back pain. Can see little faces. My leg is hurting too much, and my stomach pain has gone. Body is white at the shoulder, down it is not. Left toes are painful, the right ones also. Feeling mild pain in the stomach and heart, all clean mild pain. He has some light for my body, he has sent it to me. Still slight pain in my toe- mild pain. The body is white. My back is now of white color, the front is slowly becoming white."


She continued to describe her experience, and I have included her words in the revised text.

Wani's condition improved significantly after the sessions, and she was able to sleep properly for the first time since her mishap. She did not return for further treatment, and her mother took her to a Hindu temple for follow-up care. Wani reported being much better for the next year.




.

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Encounter with Goddess 2006

Mahi was a 20-year-old girl referred by a psychiatrist for multiple somatic complaints. She lost her father at the age of 2 and living with mother and elder brother in a tropical war affected country.

After an initial interview and review of investigation I did not find any physical cause for her illness. To find out her problem I initiated trance with soft music. She saw small girls Brahmi, Vairagi, Saraswati Durga, Vaishnavi and Laxmi (Indian Goddesses). She went back with advice to continue meditation which she had been doing from the age of four.

She was born on the day of Goddess Abhirami’s birthday, 24th February. On this day every year she witnesses Abhirami in her meditation, SHE plays Karnataka music or does Classical dance on her request.


Mahi’s unusual Birthday Gift of the year. 24th February


SHE appeared after one hour of meditation at 1030pm. SHE was looking at me but did not talk for a long time, and then she said “I will give a great present to you, for good thing you must wait for a long time. But I am happy with your prayers.

SHE closed her eyes and then touched her right eye and my right eye then SHE touched her left eye and my left.


SHE told me that I should see everything that I see. You should hear all the sounds and waves which I hear and you should feel everything which I feel.


Then you have to think deeply about why this is? Why do people take birth and die? Why is there happiness and sorrow?


Then she asked "Can you recognize me from others ? Now you can understand that everyone is depending on me. I asked why did you make the relationship between all humans begin? Is it necessary?


She replied " I send all people to a act in a Drama, I give different role which are decided by their previous life"


Do you know who you are? And Who am I? I said "I am a soul and you are the supreme soul.


She said Hindu, Muslim, Buddhist and Christians all are my children, no race, no caste; they are given by man to man. This is not your name and all of you must return to your home which is in heaven.


Some humans will return early and others also must return. If they get knowledge of the soul they return early. I will tell you the knowledge of the soul which will help you to return to heaven early.


This is an extract you can think about these words. You must give up your ego and love your brother, mother and others, then your soul will be liberated from suffering, then you will feel like asking more questions.


This must come spontaneously, where did I come from and why did I come and who did send me here.

No anger, no love, no sorrow, no sympathy no feeling, surrender to me then I will give happiness.


"O God if I am a room you will live in it,

If I am a cover you will stay as knife

Whatever you say I will do

Whatever you think I will think

I must pursue my words deeds and thoughts all depends on you

Om shanti.


22nd March

Since yesterday Devi is in my heart and she is controlling everything she is in my eyes. I cannot speak to myself. This continued for a month.


18th April

Developed severe neck and head pain and was refusing to take Reiki. Next day she could not sit and went off from meditation due to a headache.


June 11th Encounter with Goddess on Mah’s Word…


To My Dearest Mother,


First I worship your lotus feet. I will write about the incident later. But I have to ask for an excuse from you. Because I didn’t believe you at that moment and after that. I have asked some broken questions from you. Before that incident I argued with you and forgot my real life. I accept all my faults , but you are always my mother for all births, so I have the right to ask or argue with you. You know our Jaffna situation, those incidents changed me and I argue with you. I know your mercy, love and all other things. I hope you accept my excuse.

My all feelings, body and soul are given by you. Actually I didn’t think that I was a real devotee of you. I thought I am a cover, you are a knife. This is Kaliyuga, so I didn’t believe that God can come in a physical form. I have no evidence but so much effect I have. Now you are my Guru. But you are always my mother. I didn’t know Sanskrit so I asked so many questions. I didn't want anything without athmaganana. If you want to give anything to my physical life or spiritual life it is your desire.


You are loving, Dura.


11.06.2007 6 pm


I was alone at home; my grandma had gone out to see a doctor to Wellawatta. Within 2 min of closing the door someone came, I looked through window, two monks to ask alms. I told house owner is out. Then I went to meditate in my room in front of Lord Ganapathi, while meditating I opened my eye to see HIS trunk became bright and heard a voice in Sanskrit “Brahmani Naari uthiyanam”. I didn’t understand the meaning so send a SMS to Dr Deb. Then our doorbell rang, looking through window I saw a Hindu lady wearing yellow sari, Kumkum and santhana. She wanted to speak to me, but I was scared to open the door as my grandma advised. She called me again “Thura open the door I want to speak with you.” I was shocked, because this name was given to me by Devi when I was eight years old. SHE told this means Loving child. I have told this to Dr Deb only, this gave me clue and I opened the door.

There was a 3year old girl with her mother was passing who came from Kandy. She asked me in singhala “ Meya oyada ammatha?” or is she your mother? I said “no” then asked the LADY who are you? She did not reply. The girls mother asked her what are you talking, no one is there.

SHE went straight to my room and sat in front of Lord Ganapathi’s statue and closed her eyes. SHE sat in nishda for some time. I was confused and scared of Grandma, if she comes and scolds me. SHE started to speak, First she said Om then SHE recited Guru mantra “ Guru Brahma Guru Vishnu….” I was going into trance. SHE told me that I have to learn a lot. SHE started telling me about My Past Life. SHE has already told me before that I was born in Gujarat India in a Brahmin family.

“SHE was fair complexioned, taller and older to me. SHE was beautiful with merciful eyes. SHE was in a yellow sari and wearing Mangalyam, kumkum. SHE was speaking in Sanskrit and broken Tamil.”



My past life


SHE said “I have already told you that you were born in Gujarat in your previous birth in a Brahmin family. You were an only child, and you had bad friends. Your behavior was not good. Your father was an Ayurvedic physician. Your family has used Ayurvedic medicine for many generations. You were cruel to the patient coming to your father’s clinic. Most of the time you used to hide medicine, to harass your parents. You did many bad deeds during 18 -22 years of your life. Your father was very sad and did suicide, your mother also died in few days.

You started realizing your mistake. You accepted ME as your mother. You did a lot of social service later. Due to your last birth problem, you are suffering now. Other people have more problems. I gave you everything in this birth except realizing from this problem Why? You disturbed other people, so this numbness was given to me.

In your previous birth you were searching for the reality of life. You went to many places and met many people without getting satisfaction. At last, you met Dr Deb and his wife. They guided you and showed you the reality. They were giving your advice and counseling. Mrs. Deb gave great love to you. You started realizing me and asked me if I was reborn again and wanted to know reality. Send me to them as a Guru. I have already told you that he is your guru. When you were suffering last year, I arranged to send you to meet Dr Deb in Jan 2006. First you did not recognize him and after a few meetings only you could realize. You did not believe him on the first meeting, all are decided by God.

Don’t you know who is your mother (Mrs V Kailaiyngiricheham or VK) and your brother Gauribalam (G). Your mother was your last birth mother’s cousin sister and G was her son. When your mother died Mrs VK and G looked after you. You asked me to become her daughter in the next birth and G as brother. You know that your brother is very good and always prays for your health and life. Your grandma was your neighbor in your previous birth. They came from Pune to Gujarat. She also loved you.


I asked in my previous birth that I was born in India, and why was I born in Jaffna now. Why did you send me to a psychiatric doctor?


SHE replied Jaffna is a good place to get self realization. There has been war since the 70s you would learn from it more, you saw so many murders, bombasts and lost your father in the war. You have lost your three friends. You could not see your father was a curse for you, since he did suicide in the previous life due to your bad activities. You saw the physical suffering of the war. Mental suffering is worse, and to see that I have sent you to a psychiatrist. After seeing those patients you asked me not to give mental suffering to any one. Don’t you think why did you go to an orphanage and an elder's home from your small age, that was also asked by you in your previous birth.



I got a call from Dr Deb, I told him what happened, he was asking is she still there? Is she physical or metaphysical? I was in kitchen to give her cool drink, SHE also entered there. I told Dr Deb can you hear SHe is still speaking, Dr Deb could hear some background sound so I gave mobile to HER, SHE asked in Tamil “Yaru? Yarungo? (Who are you) He told his name in English and asked her to speak in Hindi or English. SHE gave phone to me.

I told Dr Deb about what she was talking about. SHE was in the hall, I was talking in my room. When I came to the hall she told all the conversation between me and Dr Deb. SHE told me, was he not asking to speak in Hindi? I was shocked.


I told her if SHE is Devi, why she refused to speak to Dr Deb in Hindi? SHE smiled and said “ Vinash kale vipareet buddhi”. She started speaking in Hindi, I was not sure what was SHE speaking so I thought is it Hindi or some other language. SHE said “ Vinash kale vipareet buddhi” (Since I had a doubt in my mind). Then I asked her shall I dial Dr Deb, do you want to talk in Hindi with him, SHE said “Kuchnahi” (means Nothing in Hindi).


Then she started speaking in English and blessed me. “This day promotes you, encourages you give you stability and strength, love with all auspicious things in the world….”


Then SHE started looking at the books given by Dr Deb published by Brahmkumari related to God and soul. SHE said why you want to read these books, if you want to know anything I will tell you with explanations. One thing you should know is that these centers and peoples are not God, they can guide you to reach us. If you want to know about Hinduism in depth I will teach you step by step.


SHE sat in front of me in Hall and started explaining to me in Sanskrit and Tamil. I missed many points because I don’t know Sanskrit.


SHE started teaching: Stages of Life


“Ego sath vibra vabutha vadanthi” three times. First you believe God 100%. Your God may be Shiva, Vishnu or Devi or Jesus Allah or Buddha. This world was given to you by your God you think. Sometime your buddhi think right way but mind not. There are two lives here Lowkik (physical) and Alokik (spiritual). You can continue your spiritual work through Lowkik life. There are four stages : Brahmcharya, Grahasth, Vanprasth and Sanyas. Now you are in Brahmacharya stage. You have done this well, you can study about physical or spiritual subjects. You might have heard stories of Ramayan and Mahabharat, prices were sent to their Guru for education about everything they need.

Next stage is Grahasth , you might have heard stories about how to do this stage.

In The Vanprasth stage they go to the forest and pray to God, next stage they take Sanyas to get Mukti. But it is not necessary to go through all stages to get mukti. In olden times people got mukti even in Grahast stage.


Way to reach GOD

SHE continued, I have already told you there are four pathways to reach God 1. Sariya 2. Kriya 3. Yoga 3. Gyana. Man can reach God by choosing any one of these pathways. Sariya stages the relationship of God and man is like servant and Lord. The Kriya stage man is a child to God. Yoga stage man is friend to God and Gyan stage man is student to God.


Remember you can select any of these paths to reach God. Servant means you do some work for God. Kriya means puja like Brahmins do for God. Yoga you reach God with some distance, but Gyana means you sit near God and get all explanations from HIS mouth and gesture.


Sariya path give Salokya Mukti. Kriya path give Sameeba mukti, Yoga give Sarupya mukti, and Gyan gives Sayuchiya mukti which is the highest point. All path are given by God and are good, but gyan path is best to realize supreme reality. When you try to reach God through gyana you will get “Atmagyana” from a guru. Most of the time God comes as a Guru.


Now you are in the Gyana stage and should improve upon it. I will explain everything clearly.


Gayatri Mantra: SHE told that it is for Natural God Savitra which is different from Sun. SHE told the meaning in Tamil


Veda

Introduction

There are four Veda 1. Rig, 2 Yjur, 3 Sam and 4 Atharva. Rig was first and Atharva was last. These were given by god to sage Vasisth, Vamadeva, Atri, Bharadwaj, and Vishvamitra, who ketpt as shruti or memories to disaples.

Rig Veda teaches about natural Gods, Indra, Agni, Varun and Chnadra as main characters. Lord Shiva and Lord Visnu were minor Gods. Gayatri mantra has been used by Hindu as morning prayer since then. Savitur is a God who is different from Sun God.


Yajurveda has methods of Puja and Ygna. In this Veda there is “Satha rudram” or 100 names of Lord Shiva.

Sama Veda has mantra in the form of song. Lord Shiva’s muscical concept is also included.

Atharvaveda has medical therapy, and hypnotherapy.

Each Veda has four parts

1. Samhita; Vedic method in poetry form

2. Brahmanas ; Pooja method

3. Aryanas – stories told by sages in forest

4. Upnishad – is the supreme knowledge, can get this knowledge under guidance of Satguru or God as Guru.

Vedas help at all four stages of people Brahmcharya, Grahasth, Vanaprastha and Sanyas. Everyone may not pass through all these stages but can directly reach Sanyas if they have good Sanskar.

Through these 4 veda, 4 parts and 4 stages one can realize his real self and get Mukti.

1. Dharm, 2. Arth, 3. Kama and 4. Mukti.

Through Dharma one can accumulate material things for happiness but real happiness is inner which gives Mukti.

There is a difference between Mukti and Jeevanmukti.

She told me about 108 Upanishiad main 20 , Taitriya is important for me. There are 18 Puranas.



SHE entered my room and saw a book on stress management “ I am Stressed” SHE asked are you stressed? What is your problem? Then she asked me to go to bed and lay down. SHE said

My dearest Dura, close your eyes, don’t think or worry about anything. SHE took a peacock feather from our pooja room and started touching me from head to toe and singing a song “Bo Sambo siva sambothuyanbo “ then she explained about Saptaswara.


Saptaswar


She sat in meditation for some time and said that she will explain this in a practical way. We were talking in our main hall, she suddenly came towards me over the right ear and said something which I could not hear. She asked whether I could feel any vibration and I said yes and all my nerves started vibrating. She said this is the first swara formed by lord Shiva "Sa".

Again she said something and I could feel a vibration which was higher pitch than previous, she said this is "Pa".

Then she hold my left ear and told something which I could hear as "ri", then I could hear ga, ma, dha, ni,. She asked could you make out difference between these two sets of swaras. I said sa, pa have no parts or cannot be discriminated while other do. She said normal humans can't understand the vibration taught by Lord Shiva.

She asked do you know why sa and pa have no discrimination and others have. I said no. She said these two swaras were formed by Lord shiva as divine sound and others were formed with Pancha mahaboota.

She told there are two types of sould (Nada) Ahata and Anahata. Ahaat nada can be understood by normal human but not anahat which was understood by Sage Tyagaraja. I knew this. But she told that all sages cannot understand this without grace of Lord Shiva. Some can feel anahat nada but cannot explain to other. God only can copose this anahat nada. It is a ineer feeling.

Now you have eneted in gyan stage and know what is anahat nada. Me and Lord vishnu realized this from Lord Shiva first . It is a vast subject and this is just introduction.

Then she told me to close my eyes and sit in nishad and my body went into trance.

She said if you want to know more you will improve your Gyana stage. Satguru Thyagaraja got this knowledge from Lord Ram.

Music will help to improve your stage.

Then she explained about Lord shiva’s Bharatanatyam



Bharat natyam and Lord Nataraja


Lord Shiva has taught Bhartanatyam, when he dances it is called Nataraj.

Nataraj form explain five duties of Lord Shiva called "Panchkritya"

1. Sristi 2. Sthithi 3. Samhara 4. Throbhava 5. Anugraha

1. Sristi is creation symbolized by Damaru in his hand

2. Sthithi is symbplized by his abhayahara

3. Samhar is destruction smbolized by fire in his other hand

4. His right leg is over a sage Muyalaga whoe degraded Lord Siva once and symbolizes Throbava. Which means to give rebirth till atma realizes and reaches Mukti

5. Left leg on his left thigh symbolizes Anugraga. Those who realize the throbava Lord Shiv givs Mukti is Anugraga.

Sristhi is due to Maya and goes back to it .

I asked but Sristhi is by Brahma, Sthithi by Vishnu and Samhar by Rudra, how come Lord Shiva is doing all this?"

She replied Lord Shiva designate these duties to five Lords

Sristhi to Lord Brahma, Sthithi to Lord Vishnu, Samhara to Rudra or Shankar, Throbhava to Lord Maheswara, and Anurag to Sadashiva.

She asked, "Do you know 108 dance forms of Lord Shiva? I said I have seen pictures. She told you to see them, now you know how much you have to study. There are two types of life Lokik and Alokik. If you desire I will help you.

You have to fight with Maya all the time, it will disturb you it has strong power and sometime with ignorance you enter into cluches of Maya. It may take you in seconds, so try to be in touch of Supreem knowledge and God and meditated well


Vibhooti

Nowadays I apply Vibhuti in the morning and evening. SHE asked me “Why do you apply this?” I said this is a symbol of Lord Shiva. SHE asked do you know any other deeper meaning. I said no. SHE asked what happened to humans after death. I said ash. SHE asked what Vibhuti contains. I said some holy things which are burnt during puja. SHE said that is also one type of Ash. It is a reminder to us that one day we will also turn into ash.

Then I touched her feet and SHE blessed me with the Mahamritumjaya mantra.

Disappeared in thin air

We were talking in the hall. There are two photos, one of GoddessLaxmi over HER head and the other Ganaoathi on the opposite side wall. SHE looked at me for some time and I went into trance, SHE asked me to close my eyes. I was scared that gramdma may come anytime so I did not close my eyes and suddenly SHE disappeared in Laxmi's photo.

Within a few min grandma came. I served dinner to her and went for sleep. I was totally drained and not feeling like eating. Got up at 9.30am (normally I get up at 6) and without taking tea dressed and went out to find out WHO was SHE.

Discovering Devi

I went to the nearby Devi temple but it was not like HER. Took bus and went to Wellawatta without knowing where I am going. After getting down from the bus walked down the lane which was unknown to me and reached Hanuman temple. First I prayed Lord Ganapathi and then went around and stood in front of Saraswati metal statue. I was shocked since HER face was same like ONE who came yesterday wearing same Yellow sari and kumkum with santhana on her forehead. I was panicked and started chanting “Sagalagal valli sthothiram”. Dr Deb called me that time and I told him everything. I was emotional and started crying. I could not understand why I came to this temple there are other Devi temple in Colombo.

Returned home by one pm, and my grandma was waiting. Took a glass of juice and went to bed. Came back in the evening to see Dr Deb and told the whole incident.


Dear Mother


I was searching you everywhere, your lotus feet Devi

I think at all time

But the time has come

I was curious to reach

the enterence of Gyana

Sang vedic verses

every yuga yuga

I was searching everywhere


Kailash Devi

Why do my mind think about you?

What is the maya?

Is this a maya?


There is a change in my dream and real life

But I can see you in all changes

If your mercyfull eyes look me

My all sins and karma will fly

You are dancing in my mind

I think about you every seconds

Why?

Why do mind think about you?





More about Tandava Dance

19th June 2007


I asked for an excuse from Dr Deb and Dr Venketesh. At night she taught me more about the Tandava dance form. SHE said there are 108 Tandava dance forms, you can see them directly if you improve your stage. I asked about the Maheshwar and Sadashiva forms. I have seen other forms in the temple. SHE showed Maheswar form, it has four hands and one head and legs are like Daksinamurthy. Then SHE showed me Sadashiva form. It has five heads and tem hands and legs like Dakshinamurthy. It is difficult to see them from Lord Shiva now.

Then SHE explained seven Tandava explaining five duties of Lord Shiva. You can see only Panchakrithya because it was given by HIM in a happy mood.

1. Srikalika Tandava – Sristhi

2. Sri gauri and

3. Sanithya Tandava - Sthithi

4. Samhar Tandava – Samhara

5. Tripura Tandava – Trobava

6. Oordhav Tandava – Anugraha

7. Anantha thandava – all five duties


When Lord Shiva started dancing Rudra Tandava, those 107 forms were given, then I controlled him and at the end Ananth Tandava was given showing all five duties.

I requested HER to show atleast six Tandava forms. SHE said you will not be able to tolerate them due to low energy. Other 107 Tandava were given in the Agora stage. You cannot tolerate or see with your physical eyes. You already know Shiva’s Aghori form in Rudravam. Lord Shiva sits in Nistha. If you want to know you should improve your mind. You know about Kama thangana ( Lord Shiva burnt Kamdeva who disturbed his Nistha) in the Rudra Agora stage.


I have been stubborn from my childhood and wanted to know those dance forms in spite of HER advising me. I have seen one form and wanted to see six more. I have never seen Devi in Agora or angry form. I have seen her at the end of Navaratri in her Mahisasur mardini form but she smiled and blessed me. At last SHE told me experience is the best teacher and went off.

I talked with grandma and slept. Suddenly I saw a huge size fiery God or Giant or Ghost I can’t explain from floor to roof. I could see only Damaru in HIS hand which was surrounded by fire. It has no physical feature; suddenly one leg started moving towards its head. I shouted amma, amma. I thought Yamaduta had come to take my grandma, and then I fainted.

Next day at 1pm I opened my eyes, my body felt so tired, had a fever. Grandma was chanting “Kanthasasthi Kavacham” and gave me a cup of coffee with Panadol and sprinkled water on my face. I asked what happened. She asked, "Why did you shout at night, did you see a ghost? I was trying to wake you up in the morning, you have a fever so I did not disturb you. She sprinkled some holy water from Devi temple, and was chanting “Kanthasasthi Kavacham” since morning. I had a fever till the next day.

I was surprise to find a statue of Nataraja and a metal lamp sent by one of my friend Mattakilya who saw me asking Nataraj satue when she was sleeping last night. She is learing Bharatnatam and pray Lord Nataraja. She got it for me from Trichi India.

I prayed that satatue and asked pardon from Devi and HIM. During evening meditation Devi showed me a Mudra “Nirekshan” thumb touching little and ring finger and index and middle finger extended. SHE said you got “gurupavai” means inspecting students while teaching a group of students, one who is interested in getting supreme knowledge. I have already told you that you don’t have enough energy to see Rudram form.

Dakshinamuthi form has one of these things Sadabara, Sadabanda and Sadamandala, Sadamukuta. You must first try to know them. Knowing them you will know 108 Tandava forms. Now you have experienced, too much of anything is not good.

I asked for an excuse from her and told that SHE knows me well and can give what SHE feels is best for me. I want to live under your lotus feet.

I came on 22nd June Asthami for Lord Nataraj and gave the statue as a present to Dr Deb.


Sapta Mata Darshan ( 25th-26th June )


26 of June [Tuesday].my mother was worried about our problem and told some incidents to me. (We have a new car at Jaffna given by my uncle to my brother after he passed first year first class. One day it was taken by Army Commander and never returned back)

At night I saw a different form of devi. who had a human body, but face was like an animal, her two hands were abhaya mudra and the other two looked like abhaya mudra but fingertips were down position. She was in a pink saree. She told ''Thura don't worry about physical matters, if you worry about it you can't reach your goal, I decide all. your mother will get good things very soon. all are Maya. first try to understand this. I’ll help your mother. don’t worry about her. through you she will get good things soon.'' suddenly I felt our floor started to separate in two parts. she entered in that distance. I prayed her. I thought that SHE was Chaamunda.

I told this to Dr. Deb on 27th of June. On the 28th of June [Thursday] I was fasting. At night before I go to bed started to pray Chaamunda. I heard a sound from our floor. I got up from bed and kept my ear on the floor, where Chamundi entered on Tuesday. I started to sleep on the floor with a mat. I could hear some. 'Thura doesn't say Chaamunda. That was Vaarahi. who is one of Saptamata.

Saptamata protect the world, I’ll show those forms.’ at that moment one Mata who came on Tuesday appeared. She said' 'she is Vaarahi. 'She wore the same pink saree. Then she disappeared. Another Mata came with white sari. She sat on a swan. She also had four hands. which had Vedas, pearl gallant ,kamandala, and one ayutham. she said ''this is Brahmi''. she disappeared within a few minutes. Then one Mata came with a red saree. She sat on Rishabha. her hands had damaruga ,trisoola ,and abayahara, she said ''this is Maheswari''. other one came, she wore green color saree on peacock, her hands had abayahara, velayutha, and 2 other ayuthas, she said ''this is Kowmary''. another one came with yellow color saree, on Garud, her hands had Shankha ,Chakra, kathayutha and abayahara. she said ''this is vaishnavi''. .Next one came with orange color saree, her hands had skull ,lotus, and abayahara , she said ''this is chamundi'' finally a mata came with blue color saree on elephant.[white color elephant]Her hands had 2 ayuthas and abayahara SHE was Indrani.

Then all the suptamatas came at the same time and went round me and blessed me. Now I have started to sleep on the floor with a mat.


On 2nd July something happened in jaffna.3rd of July my mother asked me to do meditation. I live with spiritual activities except my sannyasa life.at night Vaarahi came again and explained what happened to my mother in Jaffna. Now she has started to go to Hanuman's temple. That is also an interesting incident. On the 4th of July, I got some Hindu philosophical matters.

Dr Deb also did not know; it is not there even Devi Bhagavatam. He called me later and told me that in the Varaha Puran there is a story of Demon Andhakasur being there and Lord Shiva asking to produce Astha Matrikas to kill him 1. Yogeshwari by Lord Shiva 2. Brahmi by Brahma 3. Vaishnavi by Lord Vishnu 4. Maheswari by Lord Rudra 5. Kaumaari by Kartikaya 6. Yami by Yama 7. Indrani by Indra and 8. Varahi by Lord Varah form of Lord Vishnu. Could not find any reference of Saptamata except one temple in TN having a statue of it.


5th of July a lady spoke with me about you (Deb). I thought that was your mother. But her physical features weren't like you. Her face cut also different from you. But that person like you a lot it might be your aunt or relatives. But she understands your spiritual life. Her skin color is higher than you, I thought that was dream. But on 7th also she spoke. I could hear her voice. I have no experience like this. I never spoke with a human being except my father, but I could hear my father's voice only. I couldn't see him.so many incidents happened as the way I didn't expect.